Whether the loss of your loved one was unexpected or after a long-term illness, grief can be difficult to navigate. Here are three tips for dealing with this challenging time.
1. Talk to someone
Ram Dass said, “we are all just walking each other home.” Finding someone to ‘walk with you’ by being a listening ear will help you work through your grief. You may find it helpful to see a licensed counselor, join a support group consisting of people going through the same thing as you, or have a conversation with a friend or family member. Whichever way that you choose to deal with your grief is up to you. However, it is recommended that you find someone to talk to, so you can process your emotions and feelings.
2. Change Your View of Grief
Grief is not linear; it does happen in stages one after the other. There will be times, you will feel completely done with a stage, however you may revisit that stage several times before you are healed. Sometimes we face an all-or-nothing mentality, that there are only two stages: completely removed from the world and crying all the time, or that you have completely healed and are ready to move on with your life. Be patient with yourself and give yourself the time that is needed to heal.
3. Find Joy
Finding meaning and joy in your life and in the life of the person that you lost can be a positive step towards your healing journey. You can start by making a list, no matter how long, of the things that brought you joy about the person that you lost. Remembering our loved ones in a positive way, embracing the life that was lived and the person that they were, instead of focusing on the loss, helps us find joy again. By thinking and talking about the legacy the person left – whether it be in the contributions they made to their family and friends, or something more – we are able to remember what they meant to us, which will help the grieving process.
Remember it is a journey, it starts with taking small steps towards what can be a joyful and happy life. Victor Frankl said, “Forces beyond your control can take away everything you possess except one thing, your freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.” Good luck on your healing journey, however you choose to go about it. Our hope is that you reach out to someone that can be there for you in a safe and loving way.
